Fade To Black



My first trauma.

An uncontrollable tragedy.

The first of thousands.

A tiny snowball at the top of Kilimanjaro.

Gathering catastrophe upon descent.

A collision.

A vacancy.

Raised by fear.


My mother’s sheets.

Brown and orange stripes.

Fiona Apple… Criminal.

Stains on my homework.

Coffee this time.

Maybe Red Wine.

Let’s drive to the mountains, she said.

The Ocean.

Your Father’s ashes are there.


My first breakdown.



My own name.

It wouldn’t come out.

M m m m Melisa….

Ran away.

5th grade.

Scared to read.

Would rather be missing.

Milk Carton.

Have you seen me?

Red face.

Nicknamed Mars.

An alien.


Alone with myself.


Ride The Lightning.

Fade To Black.

The last song played.

Left for the paramedics to find.

In case I didn’t make it.


Alone yet together.

We collided.



Hurt to live.

The longest drive.


Abortion clinic.

Matchbox 20.

If You’re Gone.

Forever imprinted.

The Fetus.


You found me.

I went back.

Emptier than before.

Being insane is what makes me interesting.

Fascination Street.

There is no Cure.


One thought on “Fade To Black

  1. so much rawness! love the emotion and the openness! thank you for sharing! “there is no cure” but i disagree with you there! i have been that person, wrapped up in hurt and despair, but i found the answer! there is a cure!


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